Daily dose of C: 11/12

I woke up in the middle of the night last night in pain. My shoulder/elbow is flared up from the impromptu gardening I did Friday when I locked myself out of the house. So I took some Ibuprofen, but I was too "awake" to go back to sleep right away. So instead I watched several episodes of 30 Rock and snacked.

I have been an emotional eating fiend lately, with no end in sight really. As much as I love this time of year (holidays, birthdays, anniversary), it gets stressful and there are important decisions to make. I haven't been journaling my food intake at all the last few weeks, and finding time to go to WW meetings is becoming increasingly challenging. So today I decided to switch gears -- I cancelled WW and am planning to re-join the "little gym" by my office. I can stop in and do some jogging in a comfortable venue before or after (or during) work. I really miss jogging (and the health benefits I got from it), so I'm looking forward to starting tomorrow.

I just hope I actually follow through.

Thank you, Modern Family

A funny, yet startlingly poignant commentary on kids cereal.

I laughed my butt off, but only because I've taken steps to lower our consumption of sugar and processed junk.

Weight check-in

I started off the year at 176, an unfortunate 11 lb. gain from last August when my crazy Fall began and we quit the gym. That gain also put me over my WW Lifetime goal weight. (Incidentally I hadn't really been to WW since the end of August either!) Not a good place to be overall. We re-joined the gym in January, but my weight didn't budge over 2 months.

At the end of February, my friend also joined the gym. She encouraged me to try a Zumba class with her. It was no small thing--I'd always been too shy to try an exercise class. N would tell me about his bootcamp class and I would think, "I could never do that." Despite all my weight loss success and completing my first 5K run/walk in 2011, I just didn't think I could do it. But I agreed to go with her!

At Zumba, I was embarrassed at the teacher's attempts to help me along, and I almost walked out in tears, but I stuck with it and finished the class. Despite the embarrassment, I had fun and I planned to go again. Not only that, but since then, I have also tried two other exercise classes: cycling (spin) and step aerobics. Cycling was really tough physically to finish, but I did it. And I even went to step class all by myself!

I am thrilled to report that I now have the confidence to keep going to classes. And they do burn more calories and last longer than my typical solo workout, so I am optimistic about the health impact. I never thought 2012 would mean facing my fears. But I'm so glad I did! A switch has turned on and I have been the gym nearly 5 out of 7 days for three weeks.

I have also tracked my eating these last 3 weeks, which is something I haven't done in, well, years really. So I know where I am, and I know that I can gain (better) control over my eating and get off the weight I need to lose to fit into my size 10 jeans and regain my Lifetime WW status.

How are you doing with your New Years resolutions?

Quote of the week

from the Weight Watchers 3-month journal:

"It is better to take many small steps in the right direction than to make a great leap forward only to stumble backward."

- Old Chinese proverb

Leap Day

In writing a comment on Facebook to reflect on the previous Leap Year and the forthcoming one, I went a little too far, so you get to read the full scoop here:

In Feb. 2008, I had a 15mo old sweetheart who didn't like to sleep. N and I shared drop-off/pick-up responsibilities and we mostly still ate dinner after Bit "went to bed." I was 27 (the supposed ultimate age); N was 30; Newb wasn't a sure thing yet, but I contemplated dates/spacing an awful lot.

Looking at my g-cal for fun, we were watching LOST, getting our carseat professionally installed/inspected, having our first night away from Bit (Valentine's Day overnight), actively househunting, and I had a standing chat date with my college BFFs. I was also gaming and using Let's Dish for meal planning. I had lost 9.2 lbs in January and weighed 181.6! It was my first time in the 180's. In early March, we were lucky enough to celebrate my grandma's 85th birthday with her.

On 2/28/08, I wrote someone this story about Bit (heart-melting):

I'm taking Bit to daycare most of this week so that N can get into work early and recoup some of his lost time. This morning I misjudged how cold it was and brought Bit to the frigid car, strapped her in and got it started to warm up. She kept fussing and I could see her breath. (In the carseat she can't wear her winter coat, so she just had a fleece jacket.) I thought 'oh my, this will NOT do!'

So I got Bit out of her seat and opened up my jacket (putting hers on is a pain sometimes) and I cuddled her against me. Then we sat in the driver's seat to wait while the car warmed up. It was so nice to just sit there with her and enjoy the morning sky lighting up. She spotted a bird and said "Bir" (her new favorite word, besides "go go"). To my surprise she didn't squirm at all. We just cuddled and warmed up. I even waited an extra minute to continue enjoying the experience. Soon she'll be too big for things like that. Bittersweet sigh!

Also, N made her a toaster waffle this morning (she got up early, ugh!) and when it popped up from the toaster, she said "Uh oh". Just so cute and funny.

My e-mail signature was:

--
Buffy: Does it ever get easy?
Giles: Yes, it's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after.
Buffy: Liar.

Today, Feb. 2012, I have a 17mo old sweetheart who is a great sleeper and loves to chew on her shoes. I have a bright, beautiful 5yo who lives with zest and still doesn't like to sleep. I drop-off/pick-up the kids and Bit has just started helping me make dinner. I am 31 and N is 34.

Life according to g-cal: we are too busy with dr appts, date night, and 2 active kids to watch much TV (but let's not overlook the brilliant happiness of Roku technology!). We no longer have our carseats professionally installed/inspected. Overnights at GranB's (for the kids) are commonplace! We've been homeowners for 4 years. Sadly I don't talk to my college friends much, but I have developed some great mom-friendships. I have stopped gaming more or less and have been using Emeals and Pintrest for meal planning. I gained some weight at the end of 2011, but still weigh less than 180! I have been out of the 200's since 2007, not counting pregnancy. I am hoping to celebrate my grandma's 90th birthday with her next year, though it will require traveling this time around.

On 2/29/12, I wrote this story about Bit (heart-melting):

Here's a cute story from last week: I was in the car with Violet and we were listening to Allison Krauss's cover of "Baby Mine" (a song about loving your baby from the Disney movie Dumbo). Bit was really quiet, then I heard a sniffle. I realized she was crying...tears running down her cheeks! I worried that I had upset her or she was thinking about her mommy (since the song is sung by a mom to her baby). But no...I held her and talked to her and found out she was crying thinking about her baby sister and how sad she'd be if something ever happened to her. Isn't that just so precious??

My e-mail signature is:

--

"A goal without a plan is just a wish."

Antoine de Saint-Exupery
French writer (1900 - 1944)

Feb 2016: Who knows?

I will be 35; N will be 38; Bit will be 9; Newb will be 5. The girls will both be in elementary school, which hopefully they will enjoy. I hope N and I will both still work at places we enjoy. I hope I will have maintained my weight at a healthy level for several year. And we ought to be out of debt or close to it. I'm sure there will be changes I can't even fathom...I pray there won't be any grief or loss, but those things are inevitable in life. I just hope for the best and pray for the strength to rise to the challenges put forth to me.

TEST

TESTING
THIS IS ONLY A TEST

BEEEEEEEEEEP!!!

Motivational thought

Courtesy of the YMCA:

Our mind and body thrive when we push ourselves to our limits. This year strive to get outside of your comfort zone. Commit to being the best you can be.

The Landing Strip

So here's a suggestion for getting your Organization resolution started... Do you have a "landing strip"? I didn't until I read about it on Unclutterer:

What is it:

The idea is that you need a place to put down your purse/keys/etc. And that you keep this spot clear for that purpose. Mail can go there, but it should be sorted before you go to bed or before you leave the next morning. If you need to set up your landing strip, find a spot and clear it off! If it's a decorative spot like a table in your foyer, make it pretty, but functional. A bowl for keys, hook for purse, etc. If you already have a landing strip, clean it up--I'm always finding random papers and other things that need to be put away. Decluttering really helps us keep this space usable.

How I set mine up:

Our landing strip is an old kitchen cart in the corner of the dining room. It has open shelves were outdoor things (like bubbles and bike helmet) live, as well as our playdoh tub. There is also a drawer where our tattoo collection lives, along with some pens, etc, my phone charger, and my wireless mouse for work at home days. Next to the shelves is a cabinet where I stash empty cooler bags, diaper bags, hats, extra scarves, etc.

We have 3 hooks on the wall for N's man-purse, our regular diaper bag, and baseball hats. The top of the cart is for the paper shredder (to help with mail/filing, also keeps it off the floor, away from Newb) and open space where I put my purse and work tote bag, as well as the recipe notebooks I most frequently use. We also have a milk crate on the floor next to the landing strip to catch random bags, backpacks, coats, etc.

How I use it:

The most obvious and useful purpose of our landing strip is to have a place where I can put my purse and work tote down as soon as I get home. It also adds storage to our relatively small home. I like that there are some toys right in the dining room and they have a home. I can always tell Bit where to put her coat or backpack if I need her to help out.

Mail is a major issue for most people--ours usually is set down on the dining room table. I don't let it sit more than 24 hours as a rule and if I want to, I can shred things quickly and easily since our shredder is right on the landing strip (plugged in and ready to go). We also have the recycling trash can in the dining room, next to the regular trash can, so junk mail gets tossed quickly. It's a life saver, really--I remember how, in our first apartment, the dining room table was literally covered in junk mail until it was sliding onto the floor. So awful! This solution is much better.

Weight loss goals

Weigh in... 176
What is your:
Goal by Easter... 169
Goal by July 4th... 165
Goal by Halloween... maintain or 161
Goal by Dec. 31st.... less than 2 lb gain and keep up exercise

I went to the gym last night, despite my broken toe. It's been 3 weeks or so, time to stop being lazy. I did the bike for 30 (only 100 cal burned, wtf?) and did some weight lifting. The gym scale didn't like me though...176. =(

Oh well... time to get serious again. And stop eating so much junk!

2012 Resolutions

As usual here are my annual resolutions--I love the process of making and assessing resolutions:

1. I want to get back in shape, which I will do by reigning in my eating habits, exercising more, and going back to WW meetings (I'm free once I get back under my goal, so I have no excuse). I plan to go the gym at least twice a week.
2. I need to make time for myself and keeping our home organized, but take breaks to be "present" as well.
3. I want to keep going to church and find a way to "give back" that doesn't take too much out of my busy, introverted self.
4. I need to focus on our budget and paying down debt.
5. Finish getting our wills set up.

Thirty-one

It's been a fantastic birthday so far. For starters, I got a bagel bucket this morning. Bagels are possibly my favorite food. Then I took Newb to the Farmers Market and happily spent my $48.73 in cash. I even got a deal on my final item--local honey because I only had $6 and some change left. The lady sold it to me despite the asking price of $8.

I felt kind of restless when I got home and the other two (N and Bit) were done with baking my cake, waiting for it to cool. So I took off on my own for a Target trip. I had been buying more bulk rice and stuff, so I wanted to get some containers to store it. I got the containers and after lunch, N put up the shelf in the dining room that I've been wanting to put up. And I washed and filled my containers. I'm quite pleased with the result. I just need a few more containers for couscous, beans, and sugar.

My cake is ready and I'm chilling, awaiting our parents so we can try the vegan carrot cake (nut free) and go out to dinner at my favorite local vegetarian restaurant. Whee!

Simplify.

I am feeling a bit out of sorts this week. It's probably because we were on vacation last week and I had to hit the ground running, getting Bit into a new daycare and trying to catch up on the chores that fell to the side when I was planning for the trip. I'm also really tired...probably just because I didn't sleep well sharing a room with Newb. She's cutting 6 teeth right now! I guess she's trying to make up for the fact that, at nearly 10 months, she's not crawling yet.

Anyway, I have the desire to utterly gut our belongings and simplify life as much as humanly possible. But 1) I don't know how my family members would feel about it. For one thing, I could never turn the TV on again and be happy. I could limit computer use to the ground floor and be happy. But the rest...not so much. 2) I have no time! I can't even keep up with everyday chores and cleaning, let alone make time for side projects...sigh. Oh well, I need to let it go and focus on the good things in my life. The rest will fall into place eventually.

Updated resolutions

So here are updated goals for 2011:

1. Organize/declutter. -- ongoing process
   
2. Continue meal planning/exercise/improved nutrition. -- ongoing process
3. Save money. -- ongoing process
4. Set up our wills by 1/31 and a college fund by 3/31. -- er, work in progress!
   
5. Paint the inside of my house. Hopefully we can get a home loan and (hire someone to) do some improvement projects. -- on hold
   
   
6. Complete "Couch to 5K" and do a 5K -- done! 3/27
   
7. Reach my goal weight and get free WW -- done!
   
8. Send photos for scanning (already half paid for) -- done!

Yikes!

I have a really busy month coming at work--I have to change my workout schedule as a result. I need to commit to an altered schedule.

Stick with it

I thought I'd just share this little tidbit I wrote to encourage a friend of mine (If this does not apply to you, move on--but I think it applies to many areas of life):

I have really struggled with food since Christmas, but overall I have lost weight!

I have learned this: life is hard! And Weight Watchers(WW) is a lifestyle--that means there will be times when food is not my focus. Sometimes my life/family/work/etc demand my attention and I have to accept that the food might slide a little--as long as I'm still aware of what I'm eating and I intend to get back on track, I've found that I do eventually get back there! Small scale--I gained 1 lb a few weeks ago...now I'm down 5 lbs! Because I stuck with it. Large scale--I joined WW in 2002 (yikes 9 years ago!) at 279...I plateaued, and quit and rejoined, but certain lifestyle changes stuck with me, so I never gained it all back. Since 2007 I've only been over 200 lbs due to pregnancy and I'm still amazed at the healthy lifestyle WW has given me. I'm so grateful and happy to have found my own inner strength--but that certainly does NOT mean I don't have hard periods where my food is out of control. So, bottom line, stick with it, baby!

2011 Resolutions & Lookback

Here are the resolutions I put forth in 2009:

1. Organize/declutter. The continuing saga...
   
2. Set up our wills and a college fund. Holy cow! I still haven't done this!!
   
3. Paint the inside of my house. The continuing saga...
4. Landscape the front. Done!
5. Do some bathroom fix-ups. Finally got the tub refinished last Sept!
   
6. Work on my stress management. Well under way
   
7. Continue meal planning/exercise/improved nutrition. The continuing saga...
8. Save money. The continuing saga...
9. Get pregnant. Done!
10. Work on my photo archive project. The continuing saga...

So, I completed 2 of the 10 (20%) and made headway on 70% of the items. Only 1 hasn't been touched in 2 years, yikes!

So here are updated goals for 2011 (2011!?):

1. Organize/declutter.
   
2. Set up our wills by 1/31 and a college fund by 3/31.
   
3. Paint the inside of my house. Hopefully we can get a home loan and (hire someone to) do some improvement projects.
   
4. Complete "Couch to 5K" and do a 5K
5. Reach my goal weight and get free WW
   
6. Continue meal planning/exercise/improved nutrition.
7. Save money.
8. Send photos for scanning (already half paid for)

o hai

I have been incredibly busy--which is not surprising for a mom of 2 with a full-time job and myriad other responsibilities, not to mention a semi-active social life. The holidays were hectic, but enjoyable. My poor N is just glad they're over so things can get back to normal.

I have made several resolutions, among them getting back to my goal weight (and free Lifetime member status with WW) and making sure I include N in my planning of our lives. I'd also like to work on our debt and do some work on the house if we can get a loan.

I started the Couch to 5K program today and it was tough! But I kept thinking, I want to run a 5K when I'm 30 (which I am until September) and show my kids how they can live a healthy, active lifestyle. The most important thing I learned on this first 29 degree run...wear gloves! Wish me luck as I continue the program!

Quality vs. Quantity

There are many reason I struggle with parenting--some are situational, some are natural. I would say the biggest factors are my depression and the plain fact that parenting is hard! It has been hard since the dawn of time, whether or not people have acknowledged that fact.

In light of a recent article (link) and yet another stressful conversation (semi-fight) with my husband about getting more "adult" time into our lives, I've come to a conclusion that I need to shift my perception of family time. It's not about quantity, but quality. If we spend less time total with our daughter in a week, month, year, but are happier people as a result of self-care, then as long as she is well-cared for when we're not available, the time we spend together as a family will be happier, more relaxed, and more constructive.

If I were more mathematically inclined, I think there would be a good visual formula for this. But I'm not, so you'll just have to read my words. =)

To address some of the assertions in the article above, I think that part of the reason for parental "unhappiness" is due to the prevailing notion in American culture that life should be all about fun and entertainment. Just look at advertising and media--the attitude seems to be "work sucks, have fun!" So obviously in an environment like that, having to do the extra housework, errands, and plain old parenting that being a mother/father requires doesn't look appealing! But it's a distortion, like all of pop culture. We don't need to drive expensive cars, live in McMansions, sip $4 lattes, and have the latest gizmo--if you focus on what's important, keep things simple, then you will find happiness whether or not you have children.

My favorite motto: "Simple living frees you to simply live."

Better Day

Things have improved with Bit, yet I'm still fighting my depression. I know it's been triggered by a series of unfortunate events that have befallen those around me. I hate how their misfortune makes me glum. On the one hand, I'm glad I have empathy...but on the other, I don't want the sadness to creep in and taint my life, too. Ugh!

Blue Day

This too shall pass, but in the meantime, I'm like a deflated balloon. Sigh.